Time to Bitch!

What do you do when someone doesnt handle your child the way you'd like? It's a tough call, right?

So Maddie has been going through this stranger anxiety phase. From what I hear, its normal...at 4 months and then again around 7 months and can sometimes last till over a year. Anyway, she cries at first when she sees someone who is not me or Jae. After a while, she will be ok but she needs to just take it all in first.

There is one person who literally attacks me when she sees me with the baby. By this, I mean she will barely say hi to me or jae, and rips the baby out of my arms, runs to whoever else is in the house to show her off. She is fairly loud and crazy, but in a fun way. So obviously, the baby screams when this happens. I mean come on, the baby just got into a strange house and is feeling unfamiliar. to be ripped out of her moms arms and into a "strangers" where suddenly there is loud screaming, cooing, ahhing...that could be overwhelming for a 4month old.

How can i get them to just chill the fuck out? Can i enter the house, put my bag down, take my jacket off, take the babys jacket off and just settle in before you go goo goo gaa gaa?

Now, after all this...Jae or I or actually anyone calm, calms the baby down. She will stay in a strangers arms if tat person is just quietly walking around, patting her back or softly humming to her. She has no problems. But this one person im referring to...shes not like that. sO she will grab the baby out of the calm persons arms, and start going gaa gaa again like "OMG youre SO CUTE CUTE CUTE!! OMG OMG OMG!!!" and then proceed to sway with the baby roughly. MAddies face suddently turns scared and starts crying. This person just figures she needs to get used to it, so keeps doing it. Then she tries to hold Maddie down like a baby (cradling her in elbow position which Maddie has hated since birth)...and of course Maddie starts screaming and trying to do a push up to get out of the hold. The whole time im watching this, biting my tongue, dying to grab my baby into my safe arms.

I want to mention that 2 other "strangers" held maddie this night. both of them treated maddie with a quiet tone and just let her look around and take in the new environment. She had no problems with this. it was only when she was manhandled that she cried.

How do i get this person to back off...and not only back off, but take the time to learn what my baby likes. She is an experienced mother but not perfect. She does a lot of things wrong and has given me horrible advice. I once watched her feed Maddie a bottle. she was FORCE FEEDING maddie. i was horrified. She kept the bottle in her mouth...and when maddie started squirming (her cue that she needs a burp), this person just bounced maddie and kept pushing the nipple into her mouth, saying "shh shh shh" the whole time. it was only when maddie sarted crying and turning her head violently that she stopped and i told her she needed to be burped. maddie didnt finish the whole bottle but i knew she was full and was going to eat a few hours later for bedtime anyway...but jae walks into the room, looks at the bottle and goes "thats all she ate? she usually eats more". well cue this person to grab the bottle again and force feed maddie AGAIN. maddie is squirming and she is trying to keep the nipple into her mouth. I finally say " shes had enough, shes not hungry". she ignores me and keeps forcing maddie to eat. I was getting pissed. finally, maddie starts crying again and she stops.

WHAT THE FUCK?

this is why i dont want anyone else touching my baby but ME. this person has a few kids...but i do not appreciate the way she treats my kid. you'd think that you could trust someone with experience, right? but what ive found is that i cant trust no one. everyone raises their kids different (FYI her kids are FAT and i have no doubt this is bc she force feeds them) and experience or not, not everyone does things the same.

Let me expand on this... jaes sisters both tell me to put cetaphil on maddies face for her excema (her first few months of life). The doctor also told me, eucerin or cetaphil. I didnt have time to run out and get it...so my SIL told me she would bring me some. great.

the first night i use it, i notice it was kind of sticky and clear. I didnt remember cetaphil to look like that but the last time i had used it was when Lauren was a baby so i figured things had changed. Anyway, i wipe it on maddies face every night for like a month. One day, i decide to actually READ the freaking bottle and its facial cleanser. you know, like soap - the shit you wipe on and need to WASH OFF. so i was kicking myself for not noticing earlier but also wondering why the fuck his sister gave me this shit. I figured she bought the wrong bottle.

The next time i saw her, i was laughing about it and told her the story - totally thinking she bought the wrong bottle. she looks at me with serious face and says "yeah, thats the right stuff". im like "its facial cleanser"...shes like "youre supposed to put it on with a cotton ball, not your fingers". ok, i dont know what difference that makes but whatever. i know deep down, this shit is not the right thing for babys excema. jae ran out and bought the cetaphil lotion right away and that worked better.

Fast forward another month and jaes OTHER sister comments on how maddies skin got so much clearer. Jae chimes in and says "yeah, after we used the RIGHT stuff"...he proceeds to tell her the story and guess what she says? she says "yeah, thats the right one to use." refering to the facial cleanser. i couldnt believe these people. at least she said "yeah put it on with a cotton ball and wash it off".... the other one told me to use it like a lotion.

ok, i know im a first time mother but how does putting facial cleanser on make ANY SENSE WHATSOEVER? this just goes to show how info gets passed from person to person even if its wrong. Both of these mothers clearly shared info and it was clearly wrong but neither had the smarts enough to change it. Now, they try to pass it on to me. who knows how many other mothers are doing what they've suggested.

Anyway, we use the lotion and its much better for her skin. Friggin facial cleansER! I was wondering why it was so sticky and gel-like. I trusted her to know....and didnt bother to check the bottle. This is why i dont trust anyone anymore!